humble

no sea to shining sea
these curtains will fall
like the Berlin wall
see a ghost cowering in the corner
I’ll be grind into dust
by the powers that be
but they’ll never take
an ounce of your true identity
oh my life
oh my soul
why have you abandoned me?
why now doubt
and turmoil
these thoughts coil

and make us

—humble

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Lumps

Maybe I get more depressed than you think

you flutter those lids and i’ll be wafting away

say it like you thought it would matter

say it like you wrought enough armor

I’ll pretend that I’m listening

while we do a bit of soul searching

what kind of glue holds us together

does it weight us down like a fetter?

we can waste some time

rewinding cassette tapes crimes

and watch these sure hearted faces fade

but dial down on my fiery presence

I wanna open my heart and the floodgates

but I’m not sure how  to be brave

I don’t wanna avoid  this anymore

and be a double edged blade

you’re just drilling all these doors

and me with these breakneck confessionals

we  get used to lumps nesting in our throats

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Relief

Fake it

until you make it

until you break it

all those pillars you built

that ground that you tilt

an inward sigh, a relief

a retreat

life’s essence is in the catch and release

inhaling and exhaling

letting go of all the excess

the inessentials

and grasping hold of enamored ones

and graveyard shift friends

tapping into the pulse of life

indwelling in imagination

finding that line

that only seeks

the well-being of all men

finding the source of all that is good

and leaving it  here to give birth

to more, more,  and more

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Create

 

rev up this engine
pull in the reins
maybe I’ll be cause for ruin
conclusion or cause for confusion

maybe the next fix

I’m a incongruent expat
a pocket universe to uncover
how this bird flutters
melting into butter
a million sighs we’ll surrender
fill in the blanks
that you wrap around your neck
an inkling to

create

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Percentage

what began as frivolity
became inequality
seeing the world through keyhole
so sweat off the baltic sea
bring back these forgotten memories to me
these enzymes fuel this reaction
putting us on cruise control
another pinky promise
was fractured and broken
a fossil calcified
now being uncovered, mended
being slowly apprehended
stubborn unyoked animal will
is land to be tilled
long for such a reality
in more than 140 characters
to be fully fleshed out
rather than a buffet line of images
take, chew, spit out repeat
haven’t grown past baby teeth
we never swallow
making us hollow
this untouchable image
reveals to us our 1 percentage

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Berkeley

i hope that you can forget
as if we never met
your intj mask showing
a warm body to grow on
she don’t smile too widely
tries too hard to be wallpaper
walks forward without hesitation
but you’re going to Berkeley
and me becoming clergy
what’s the point of pop infatuations?
when you’re confusing reality and fiction
and maybe you are only a codex
I could never find

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Inner most

i am that echo
silently singing
slowly writhing
always conniving
simple addition
chemical affliction
life is birthed
in closets and attics
and pantomime
each movement and representation
a chess match dance
always resting on the cusp of…
a fallen angel
or an uncharted territory
reaping where we haven’t sown
treading into danger
unheading suspicious strangers
wandering into the outer reaches
until we find ourselves resting
in our innermost being

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catipillar

heaven knows how far gone
the swing sways
the school bus delayed
in this ungodly hour
how we cower
and bowing to wood and stone
on top of these pillar of bones
how I longed to see your face
one last time
simply beyond this pixelated mess we’ve made
did you have even an ounce realism
or am I lost here in cyberspace
in all the search and seizures
that tracked my history
was it lost in the silence?
all I wanted was you for myself
is that so selfish?
am I bound to sulk in this echo chamber?
until I molt into a catipillar?
nibbling, biting
never swallowing

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Corrie (For the Chow’s)

A bundle of emptiness
stirring
an entrance into oblivion
a beginning/ an ending
tiny fists, kicking feet
two baby teeth
a voice in Ramah
Rachel weeping
future hopes retreating
kneeling by an unmarked grave
on a sunny, low-cut grass day
this void unrelenting
you should be
blossuming safety inside of me
not stinging, a swarm of bees
will you recognize me?
in heaven?
will you be a grown woman?
what was the sum of cellular life?
when it leaves us more empty?
lonely family
with a lost piglet
gone prematurely

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Each tick

each tick is closer to the unknowable
as if I could exhale a carburetor
to get the machine rumbling again
my inability to hold one concept
and my ineptitude in a singular pursuit
this drinking water pours through the cracks between my hands
my ideals slip away
like a race dog running after a stuffed bunny
pinning for more novely and discovery
exploring the vast reaches of ingenuity
in the far reaches of the infinite galaxy
preceving the next rubrix cube
astroid, planet, star
to be shifted and shaped
create and uncreate
binding and locking
past and present coalescing
balancing both reality and fantasy
come find me
I’ll be clinging on the moutain side
and slurping from the fountain gushing
as the rain evaporates from the pavement on a popsicle summer day
come find me
and whisper in my ear
all you hold dear
come find me
and tell me that I’m a stranger
and a friend that you’ve always knew
and recognize that we are bound for the promised land
where the harvest is full and the fruit is rippening
waiting for  children all dressed to pick
and the juices dripping down their mouths
come find me

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